Day Forty Four

Update: Cake Eyes

Another morning opening with Cake Eyes. I grabbed three samples of coffee and shot them down at my register, waiting for my face to lift. I didn't have the energy to see the best in people today. I couldn't help but feel that my last week was going to be miserable and people were going to be mean. I wasn't going to start a conversation with Cake Eyes even though neither of us had customers. I just kept my eyes down.

CAKE EYES: So I hear you're quitting.

I couldn't believe my ears. I slowly moved my head up. Was Cake Eyes talking to me? She was.

ME: Yeah. I got new work related to my professional field.
CAKE EYES: When does it start?
ME: Right now I am juggling all three jobs and I'm not sleeping much. I'm just trying to make it to work on time.
CAKE EYES: And how's that working out for ya?
ME: [I laughed] I know...I got three hours of sleep last night. It sucks. Do you lose sleep from back pain?
CAKE EYES: Actually I sleep well. That is my one saving grace.

I was surprised that Cake Eyes would use any of the air in her lungs to start a pleasant conversation with me. Later on we talked about wine. She told me that she used to love wine from Australia. Her ex-husband was from there. I had recently had an Australian wine at a great bar in Dallas. C.E. lived 3 minutes from the store and said she doesn't go far out of town. She asked me about where I live. To get to the grocery store usually took 30 minutes. To the church I work for and the university, 40 minutes. If my shift ever started near rush hour my commute took longer. I think she finally understood why I didn't always make it to work on time. Oh, to be understood!

Update: Crazy Red Head Vegan

Crazy Red Head Vegan was a no-show yesterday. She didn't make it to her shift today either. I found out from Emmy that CRV would no longer work at the store. It seemed to be an appropriate exit. I couldn't imagine a big weird/hilarious farewell from Crazy Red Head Vegan. I thought about what this meant. No more drama, mood swings, ill-timed inappropriate dialogue, or unsolicited advice to strangers about how they should give up meat. I wondered if this meant that nothing interesting would happen in my last seven days as a cashier.

Hard Ginger

A woman came into my line to buy crystallized ginger.


ME: How is this? Does it taste good?
WOMAN: Heavens no. I'm taking it because I am sick.
ME: Ginger is supposed to be really good for you though!
WOMAN: Doesn't sound appetizing.
ME: I used to hate ginger and now I love it, especially when I cook Indian food. Tastes change over time. I remember that used to hate the taste of cheesecake.
WOMAN: Ugh. Now there's something I wish would make me feel better.

Medicinal cheesecake? Yes! Somebody please make that happen.

The Nutritionist

A little girl and her mom walked into my line and like many kids before her she was drawn to the container of lollipops.


GIRL: What is this?

The mom continued to unpack her grocery cart.

GIRL: Organic lollipops? What does this say? [slowly read] U-S-D-A Organic. It must really be organic!

The mom organized food items on the belt.

GIRL: Naturally flavored too! Let's see. There's watermelon, mango and blueberry? Blueberry is so good for you!

The mom opened her bag to get her checkbook out.

GIRL: And they're gluten-free! This is the healthiest lollipop you can get!
MOM: I want you to know that I'm not listening to you.

Defeated, the girl moved forward so the mom could pay for groceries. I smiled because that little girl was a younger version of me. The mom was a younger version of my mother. The little girl may not understand it now, but one day she will be glad her mom didn't give her everything she asked for. Her candy rejection aside, I think this girl could have a career in marketing.


The Sampler

The store was pretty busy at one point and every cashier had at least four people in line. My next customer walked up wearing a nice perfume. I decided to compliment her on it.

ME: I like your perfume!
WOMAN: I'm not wearing any perfume.
ME: Really?

Huh. Who was I smelling? I turned around and asked Mad Kathy if she was wearing perfume. She said no. Up next in line was a gentleman.This guy was unshaven and wearing plaid. I didn't want to ask if he was wearing a floral perfume. Well, to each his own but it wasn't likely. After he left the scent remained and grew stronger.

KATHY: Now I smell it too. Where is that coming from?

My next two customers were a couple and though the smell got stronger when they walked up, I could tell by the sneer on their faces and the filtering of their breaths through their t-shirts that it wasn't them. Next in line was a woman and her young son. The scent became almost to strong for me to handle. That was when the woman spoke up.

WOMAN: I'm so sorry.
ME: Why?
WOMAN: We were in the health and beauty section and my son asked me if he could spray a perfume sample on me. I let him do it.
ME: That's kind of cute!
WOMAN: Well, what I didn't know was that after he tested one on me he tested the rest of the perfumes on himself.

I looked down at the little boy. He was halfway hiding behind his mom, gripping her leg. Poor thing! He couldn't hide what he did from anyone within a 15 foot radius!