Day Ten

Actor

A woman came to my line with a bottle of wine.

ME: So ma'am, how long have you been 21?
LADY: Oh, I'm 60. I have no problem admitting it.
ME: Cool, so you're almost retired, huh?
LADY: I'm an actor so I never retire.
ME: Ooh! You're an actor? What roles have you done lately?
LADY: I was in The Taming of the Shrew, but that was 25 years ago.
ME: Oh.
LADY: Now I teach acting at a high school. Some of them tell me they want to be actors, then I laugh at them and maybe try to steer them in the right direction.

Lucky kids...

Observation :


Old dudes that wear t-shirts decorated with the grim reaper also tend to have arms covered in tattoos and they always look like Hulk Hogan. They are also always some of the most kind, happy and friendly people I meet. Just an observation.

Old Lady #1

This old lady came in through my line and gave me a big reusable bag to put their groceries in. I noticed there was writing on the inside of the bag, but I didn't think anything of it. After they paid, I handed the old lady her bag.

OLD LADY: Sorry that the bag is inside out.
ME: Oh. That's fine, it still works right?
OLD LADY: Yeah. It's just that the bag advertises crime cleanup and I didn't want people to think things.

Since when did crime cleanup companies give out reusable bags? I didn't know crime cleanup was becoming so eco-friendly. How did this lady get this reusable bag? Was it a gift for services rendered? Who uses a reusable bag from a crime cleanup company?

NYPD

Earlier in my shift, a man came through my line wearing a Chicago Fire Department-shirt. I asked him if he was in the Chicago FD and he said yes. He told me he worked there for many years and lived in a suburb 15 miles south of the city. I thought that was cool. Later in my shift came an older man who was wearing an NYPD cap. I asked him if he was in the NYPD. He told me a dear friend of his was in the NYPD. He said he died in the attack on 9/11 and the family of this brave policeman had since moved out of New York. He said he wears the NYPD cap everyday in honor of his friend's sacrifice. I told him I was sorry that he lost his friend. Hearing about this made me not want to ask a question like that ever again. So sad.

Hippie Apples, or "Happles" For Short

A whole family came to my line to check out groceries. I tried so hard to keep from staring. The mom was a flower child. She wore a tie dye peasant blouse. What was far more interesting was that all four of her children were dressed like her. Two boys and two girls, all with the same hair cut as their mother, long hair with bangs. Yes bangs, even on the boys. The boys were walking the fine line between childhood and youth as evidenced by the peach fuzz over their upper lips. They had bangs. The best part of all? The dad looked nothing like any of them. He could fit right into a live film version of King of the Hill. He was an older dude with a beer gut, donning a signature t-shirt that displayed the message, "I'll be nice to you if you stop being an idiot." An alternate title for this entry was "Hank and the Bohemians."

Update: Elvira

Today was the first day Elvira looked me in the eye.

ME: How is your day going?
ELVIRA: It's alright.
ME: Has it been busy?
ELVIRA: So and so. [she waved her hand from side to side]

That was the most we have ever talked, ever. Eye contact? Body language? I was in shock and elated that there was the slightest chance that Elvira could be turning around. Progress!!